The Forzley Family
Downers Grove, IL
What is your favorite family tradition?
WEEKEND BREAKFAST!!!! Our favorite thing to do is wake up on a Saturday or Sunday morning and go to breakfast as a family. Hannah loves her pancakes, eggs and sausage - but really loves all the people at the restaurant. She's all about putting on a show.
Tell us about your favorite family story.
Our favorite family story is the story of us. Like so many others, we struggled for years to get pregnant - and despite trying many different options, it just didn't happen for us. Knowing adoption was always something we were interested in, we shifted our focus from getting pregnant biologically to learning as much as we could about the adoption process.
In 2015 we ultimately decided to move forward with an adoption plan. Fast forward a few years, we found ourselves on the "waiting family list" waiting for that phone call telling us that we would be parents. We officially went on the list in April of 2017 and we didn't get our first call about a potential child until April of 2018.
Unfortunately, we went through the roller coaster of being up for a match another 5 times and not getting picked - until December of 2018, which is when this story really gets good. It was Friday, December 14th and we were at work when we got an email from our case worker about a potential child. This was a little girl who had been born in November and had been waiting in the agency nursery for a family to be selected.
She asked us to take the weekend to review all of the information and get back to her on Monday if we wanted to move forward and be considered for selection. For those who don't know about adoption, our agency would match birth mothers with families who match their criteria. The waiting families then review medical information and determine if they want to move forward. If they do choose to move forward, the birth mother selects from a group of 4-5 families based solely on "profile books".
We had been through this process 5 times prior and did not get selected, so were thinking more of the same on this one. Never-the-less, we took the weekend to review all the information we were given and made the decision to move forward.
On Monday morning, my husband Matt, emailed our case worker with the following email. "Hi Kathy - Christina and I spoke and we would like to proceed with this profile. I'm sure with the Holiday's this decision may take awhile, but we're very excited so please let us know if you hear anything."
Exactly 8 minutes later, Matt received a call on his cell phone - a call he'll never forget. Matt: Hi Kathy, did you get my email Kathy: I did, and that's why I'm calling Matt: ...... Kathy: You and Christina were the only ones that met all the criteria she was looking for and you were the only family we presented. We just wanted you to come to that decision on your own. Matt, Merry Christmas - you can come get your daughter. Matt: *Barely able to speak through the tears - Thank you. Thank you so much. We'll be there for her soon.
The next few hours were a total blur. All we remember was going to work that morning at 8 am. Learning we had a daughter by 8:30. Arriving home from work by noon after getting our affairs in order or an extended leave. Getting to the agency by noon. Bringing our daughter home for the first time by 6 pm.
After about 5 years of trying to conceive, another year of getting through the adoption application process and 1 1/2 years of waiting for our child - our Hannah was home and we were parents.
What is your family's motto?
Worth the Wait
Share Your Parenting Wisdom
What's your number one tip for new parents?
Do not compare your child to others. They will all walk, talk, eat, sleep on their own timetable. Worrying that your kid is behind just because another one does something faster, takes away all the joy when they finally do reach that milestone. Enjoy the ride because they change so so fast.
What has been the most surprising thing you've learned as a parent?
How quickly these kids learn things. For the longest time, Hannah wouldn't crawl. Then one day she got on her knees. The next day she was rocking back and forth. The next day she was crawling everywhere. It's so amazing to see the light bulb go off.
Tell us about your funniest parenting story (we all have them!)
So Hannah was awful in the car. Hated her car seat. Even for short rides she would flip out and scream. We had no idea what was going on and just hoped it was a phase.
Well one day while at the store, I needed to ask one of the employees how to adjust the straps on the car seat as she got bigger. At this point she was about 7 months old and needed the bigger straps. So the women started talking us through step by step.
1. Remove the infant insert, which you would have done months ago
2. Remove the straps
3. Put the straps through the next slit and slide it through to connect.
All pretty straight forward, right? Nope. We never removed the infant insert! We thought it was just extra padding. So for like 5 months longer than we should have, we kept stuffing Hannah in the car seat like a sausage. Believe it or not, she's a much better rider in the car these days :)